Yes, we've all heard that romantic cliche.

A man gets down on bended knee, stars in his eyes and a song in his heart as he lets his declaration of love fall from his lips, telling his beloved that she (or he) is what gives his life purpose.

And sure, that sounds all well and good. We attribute this kind of hyperbole to feelings of love and dedication. By pouring all of our energy into this one idea, we elevate it's meaning from mere love to a revered idea of adoration.

But maybe we don't fully realize the kind of pressure this can put on someone.

Because what are we really telling them? Is it "I love you"? Sure, of course it is. But what about "I'm dependent on you"? Not many people would choose that option. And they don't because it puts them in a state of vulnerability.

When we say that someone gives us a reason to live, we invariably tell them that the primary reason for our continued existence is because of some ineffable quality about their character. Maybe they're funny, maybe they listen to you when you need a shoulder to cry on. They can be anything, so long as they provide you with a purpose. And this can be a tremendous strain on a person. In fact, it's a strain on both parties involved.

It's a strain because it isn't a symbiotic relationship. One person feels dependent upon the other for validation, while the other must shoulder the burden of expectation. Each has their own problems, and nothing beneficial comes from the tension.

Then again, maybe the phrase really is just a declaration of love. A simple desire to tell someone how important they are.

If that's the case, I think we need to change our perception of that commonly heard phrase. There needs to be an established difference between "you give me a reason to live" and "you give me a reason to exist". The latter is more passive, and evokes that mentality of dependency. I want the former to mean so much more in how we view relationships.

I want the word "live" to mean a desire for self-advancement. A need to improve, and to experience new things that the world has to offer. Go swing dancing on a whim. Book a trip down to the cape just because you can. Use your partner as a lightning rod for all the inherent creativity in the world around you. Let them be the fuel that ignites your passions, and allows you to look at your dreams as not some far-off goal, but as the next train station stop.

Don't limit yourself. Love is a powerful thing, and it's best to turn that power outward instead of inward. Simply existing wont cut it, especially in a world of unbridled connectivity. Pursue your passions, and find a partner who will make the journey worthwhile.